Black Uniforms - “Splatter Punx on Acid”

I’m not sure how I missed these guys when I was researching Swedish punk bands before our trip to Stockholm last year, but I obviously did.  Mind you, Black Uniforms only put out two albums despite having formed around 1980 and continuing intermittently for quite some time, so it’s not like they have a lot of material out there.  I may have to go back and check some of the Swedish comps I picked up on that trip to see if these guys are included.

Splatter Punx on Acid (subtitled “from the vaults”… the vaults of what, I have no idea) is a band comp of sorts that was one of the first releases by American label Hardcore Holocaust Records back in 2001.  All the songs were recorded between 1986 and 1989, in the heyday of metal before grunge came along and kind of stepped on its toes for a few years.  But don’t be confused, my friends, and think that this is some kind of Los Angeles style hair metal.  This is the real deal from Scandinavia, where they know what real metal sounds like and don’t screw around.  This is the part of the world that invented Black Metal and also fully embraced punk early in the movement, and frankly they put a death grip on it and aren’t letting go any time soon.  Black Uniforms were playing pure thrash when American mainstream fans thought Poison was heavy metal and Twisted Sister was so terrible that they might corrupt poor little Johnny forever if he saw the video for “We’re Not Gonna Take It”.  Meanwhile, in Sweden Black Uniforms were recording songs like “F.O.A.D” (Fuck Off and Die) and “Suck My Cock”.  Sorry Poison, you lose.

All the song titles on Splatter Punx on Acid are in English, and as near as I can tell most (if not all) the lyrics are as well, though you’d really have to listen close to hear the words in this speed thrashfest.  Not that it matters too much.  If you like that middle ground where punk meets metal at a high rate of speed, like two trains coming head-on at each other on the same track, then Black Uniforms are for you.  Headbangers be warned - your neck will be sore after listening to Splatter Punx on Acid.